Only the Onion can cut to the bone like this,
New Law Would Ban Marriages Between People Who Don't Love Each Other
It's Thirsty Thursday - Don't You Need a Drink after That ?
I have to admit that I do like this tune. his voice is not too out of range in this one, and the auto tune actually helps him have a background; since Akon sounds like Elevator Music. The bartender is cute too. you are probably wondering what this has to do with loveless couples. well no suprise both T-Pain and Akon are in controversial marriages. Akon is supposedly married to FOUR Women; and T-Pain was recently caught up in drama about a Skripper. no not the one in the video, but a real life skripper that he made it rain a lil too much on. uuuhhhruhhh yeah! either way, neither, uh ruh NONE; (side-eye) of their wives is jumping up and down in the news about their private lives; because they're P A I D Majorly.
Now I wonder how that's gonna work when Dwayne Wade and his wifey Siohvaughn go to court after her retracted assertions that he gave her an incurable std. wow, smack down. then the Shaq and Shauni do Divorce show is bound to be a courtside thriller. (wink*wink) because it's Shauni's best friend that Shaq was Shackin up with (cute I know) for three years of their marriage. Talk about Extra Large Skank. whew. no wonder she moved to the other coast. I hope he's having Ben Stein put some of them comcast ducats into a fast earning money market, cause after 3 babies and ten years, he's gonna have to count out.
but the biggest of them all is Tiger and his wifey + crew drama. there's talk about a divorce; more kitties popin out of the woodwork; and then BAM Tiger disappears into sex rehab. supposedly Mrs Tiger went to see her bad cub and things are being chatted out with the purchase of a new yacht; called Seclusion. (side-eye)
I wonder if that's where (s)he plans to put his mateys'. get it - matey's ? I Know this mix of modern patois, and skank is intoxicating to all of us. but the biggest bomb was the one we all heard a few days ago when one of the mateys' - the Porn Star; claimed Tiger Got Her Pregnant - T W I C E. OHHHH YESSSS....
Joslyn James, the porn star linked to Tiger Woods, claims that the golfer twice made her pregnant.
Miss James, 32, real name Veronica Siwik-Daniels, said that she miscarried the first pregnancy at around the same time Woods' wife Elin Nordegren gave birth to daughter Sam in 2007.
In an interview, she said she aborted the second baby around the same time as the birth of Woods' son Charlie in February 2009.
"Elin was pregnant with Charlie at that time [the second pregnancy]. I just didn't want to ruin anything," she told US TV show Inside Edition. Insisting that she felt bad for Ms Nordegren, sahe said: "She didn't deserve this, and she didn't deserve being humiliated." Miss James said she fell in love with Woods thanks in part to intimate text messages he allegedly sent her, including one that said "Baby I'm not going anywhere or doing anything. You please me like no other has or ever will. I'm not losing that." "Because of what he said to me and the fact we were together for so long, I believed that he loved me, too," she said.
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2 comments:
Great satirical video on Tiger, RE. I am so sick of his business. He will continue on in golf and whatever because he is a money-maker for them. As for his personal life, I could care less anymore. When the public sprinkles the glitter on you, don't you think maybe a higher standard of character should be sent in return?
Cher, do you think he's making money being a bad boy ? a friend told me today that his stock dipped and now it's rebounding because men and women love to support a badboy. apparently that's what kept michael jordan in the game for so long as well.
I hope he gets a nine iron at the press conference. and not on a plaque; if elins lawyers are any good. they oughta dna discovery test his ass right there on tv. that would tell us who's hole he's been puttin his wood near.
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